Ideas Aren’t Always What They Scream

24 03 2011

There is nothing like when your passion takes hold. The flame spreads, it gets higher and higher. The heat is palpable. In fact, I have to write this blog just to let off some steam. What began as a spark and grew to a flush of inspiration is on the verge of exploding up into a full-blown practice.

I know everyday won’t be this productive. Believe me. Any writer who is still writing has dealt with drought. But since they are still writing, they have learned how to turn that to their advantage, to find some creative opportunity be it just a sentence a day, a word, or even just staring at the screen or a notebook for fifteen minutes a day (which can be akin to something meditative). Something in that ritual pulled them through; they pulled themselves through. Because they had to. Those no longer writing? I guess they didn’t need it bad enough.

It makes me wonder what it is that we need. There can be no more pretentious thing to say than, “I am writing a novel.” Perhaps that is why many young writers are so glib about telling people. They either want people to know, or they realize how ridiculous it sounds but they still want people to know because it is such a large task.

At thirty four, I am not sure I am still considered a young writer. But I know that I don’t want to tell anybody I am writing novel. Of course, I just told you. It’s like walking around with a giant egg. People are not sure whether it’s real or not, let alone whether it will actually hatch.

One thing I want to remember, is how I feel right now. Because the exhilaration won’t last forever, especially when the work really piles on.





How Do You Know When You’ve Spread Yourself Too Thin?

10 03 2011

When things start falling apart. Purveyors of conventional wisdom might say. I might say. Modern tech-savy yogic zen caffeinated Audi-affiliated professionals all might say. (But it is beyond this blog to guess what they might say. That should be a blog to itself, though I don’t think it’d be worth more than a few laughs and some awful truths.)

So how do you tell when things are falling apart, when they were so tenuous to begin with? You can’t pay your rent. Credit cards. Gas! Shit, who can pay for gas these days, other than petroleum execs? They’re a mighty incestuous bunch.

So you’re saying it’s relative. Okay. The all-inclusive, water-muddying relative. Reminded of a Chris Rock bit, I have to chuckle: If Bill Gates woke up with Oprah’s money, he’d jump out a f’n window. Safe to say, for most of us having Oprah’s money would be considered neither too thin nor falling apart.

The funny thing (and not unrelated, you’ll see) is, I am currently unemployed. Just for a couple weeks. It’s nothing to worry about, the number one hazard of a freelance occupation. So, I’d have to work real hard to spread myself too thin. It’s possible. In this time I have been cultivating two blogs, a yoga practice, a twice-daily meditation ritual, a novel, an album, an obsession with reading (real books and on my iPad), a sure-fire beach bicycle route, a lasting relationship with a canine, and a love of grilling artichokes. It’s phenomenal. It’s akin to truly living a dream. If only the amount in my savings account would go up, not down. I should really add some sound mixing to the list, not least of all for my mental health.

The record shall speak for itself.